Today I moved to a new office space and I was so excited! My morning started up with several unexpected issues and I rushed to haul everything in one trip. It’s about a 5-minute walk and my schedule didn’t allow for two trips. My original #Instagram post was written while I was catching my breath after struggling up a poorly paved road. I lied about not feeling sorry for myself. Although I wasn’t in full-on self-pity mode, I did feel a little sad for myself. Like every situation involving human beings, the photo does not provide an accurate glimpse of what led up to this particular Instagram post. I didn’t feel sad about carrying things, but I did feel very unsupported. Was it anyone’s fault? Yes. Mine.
This was my original post:
Now that I’m sitting comfortably in AC and no longer a sweaty animal, I’m feeling so silly that I felt like I didn’t have support because I didn’t ask. I work with the most incredible people and if I had asked, I would’ve easily gotten some assistance in lightening the weight of this trek to my new office space. The truth is I have a huge problem with asking for help. Perhaps it’s rooted in fear that I’ll be seen as “less than” if I let people know I need assistance. I chose to work in a helping profession because I genuinely enjoy assisting other people realize their own potential. When it comes to other people, I am happy to assist and always encourage my clients to utilize their resources.
When it comes to making sure my own needs are met, I would… rather not. Like many other social workers, I don’t do a great job at taking care of myself. I ate lunch at 4:30pm before my last client was scheduled at 5pm. Instead of leaving by 7pm (I actually finish at 4:30pm), I stayed a little later and tried to organize my space so my desk wouldn’t look like a wreck tomorrow. I’m primarily motivated by being useful for others because I spent most of my life feeling quite uncomfortable if I wasn’t occupying all my time being productive. The only time I feel okay about relaxing is when I’m in the midst of a bout of depression and it’s hard for me to convince myself to wear pants. Continue reading “From #SweatyAF to “Let’s love ourselves more” within 10 hours”
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